Bored

by **IanC** » Sun Feb 10, 2008 6:55 pm

Quite a few of them are before my time, so quite a few of them are new

by **catastrophile** » Wed Feb 27, 2008 5:23 pm

http://writingenglish.wordpress.com/200 ... -teachers/

by **Watery_tart** » Wed Feb 27, 2008 6:09 pm

TL DR

Well, I'll read the rest tomorrow

I really like 1 and 5 they sounded very heartfelt

by **katzenkoenig** » Wed Feb 27, 2008 6:17 pm

Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.

:lol:

The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn’t.

:lol:

by **JD-Rom** » Wed Feb 27, 2008 6:19 pm

"He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up."

:lol:

"She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up."

:lol:

This sounds like something Weird Al would say in narration.

by **catastrophile** » Wed Feb 27, 2008 6:22 pm

I once told a girl that her laugh reminded me of my cat throwing up. She took it pretty well.

by **Nik** » Wed Feb 27, 2008 9:02 pm

These are fun. And funnier than the original.

by **PonderThis** » Wed Feb 27, 2008 10:54 pm

Nik wrote:These are fun. And funnier than the original.

There's something wrong with my pants!

by **JD-Rom** » Thu Feb 28, 2008 4:05 am

PonderThis wrote:
Nik wrote:These are fun. And funnier than the original.
There's something wrong with my pants!

"I'm an empty grocery sack!"

:lol:

by **Skimba** » Thu Feb 28, 2008 11:07 am

The pants one is wonderful.

"I think my toes are jealous of my fingers because they get to point at things."
I believe that I had that same thought years ago while under the influence of a substance and laughed for a long time at it.

by **sum yun gai** » Thu Feb 28, 2008 11:58 am

JD-Rom wrote:
PonderThis wrote:
Nik wrote:These are fun. And funnier than the original.
There's something wrong with my pants!

"I'm an empty grocery sack!"

i came back as a bag of groceries accidentally taken off the shelf before the date stamped on myself....

by **JD-Rom** » Thu Feb 28, 2008 11:59 am

Customer: "Does this monitor come with the latest version of the Internet?"

[slaps forehead]

Edit: You know what? I'll just give you the entire shebang if you're REALLY bored.

by **Skimba** » Thu Feb 28, 2008 12:37 pm

sum yun gai wrote:
JD-Rom wrote:
PonderThis wrote:
Nik wrote:These are fun. And funnier than the original.
There's something wrong with my pants!

"I'm an empty grocery sack!"

i came back as a bag of groceries accidentally taken off the shelf before the date stamped on myself....

*love*

by **Nik** » Thu Feb 28, 2008 2:59 pm

JD-Rom wrote:Customer: "Does this monitor come with the latest version of the Internet?"

[slaps forehead]

Edit: You know what? I'll just give you the entire shebang if you're REALLY bored.

Ah thanks! I read through that site about two years ago and lost it. Now I can see new stuff again.

by **JD-Rom** » Thu Feb 28, 2008 4:51 pm

Nik wrote:Ah thanks! I read through that site about two years ago and lost it. Now I can see new stuff again.

YORE WELLCUM.

by **ntw3001** » Fri Feb 29, 2008 9:54 pm

Nik wrote:These are fun. And funnier than the original.

I prefer the ones where Garfield is there but his dialogue is removed. That way Jon spends less time talking to himself and more time reprimanding his cat. There's a dynamite one where he stands there and says 'You're lazy, Garfield!'

'Lazy, lazy, lazy!'

by **chrismachine** » Sat Mar 01, 2008 12:27 am

A TUNNEL ?!

by **chrismachine** » Sat Mar 01, 2008 12:46 am

hey look, I made one. It's not quite funny.

by **Chrono Crow** » Sat Mar 01, 2008 10:00 am

http://flickr.com/groups/songchart/pool/page1/

by **EvilJekyll** » Tue Apr 08, 2008 3:12 pm

http://www.hubertdelartigue.com/pp_xwing_01.html

by **James** » Tue Apr 08, 2008 3:22 pm

Chrono Crow wrote:http://flickr.com/groups/songchart/pool/page1/

Ultimate win.

by **Chrono Crow** » Wed Apr 09, 2008 3:06 am

WHAT?

by **Zombie Protestor** » Wed Apr 09, 2008 10:55 am

From The Best of Dear Abby:

DEAR ABBY: I've been going steady with this man for six years. We see each other every night. He says he loves me, and I know I love him, but he never mentions marriage. Do you think he's going out with me just for what he can get? GERTIE

DEAR GERTIE: I don't know. What's he getting?
________________________________________

DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend is going to be twenty years old next month. I'd like to give him something nice for his birthday. What do you think he'd like? CAROL

DEAR CAROL: Never mind what he'd like. Give him a tie.
________________________________________

DEAR ABBY: Are birth control pills deductible? KAY

DEAR KAY: Only if they don't work.
________________________________________

DEAR ABBY: Our son was married in January. Five months later his wife had a ten-pound baby girl. They said the baby was premature. Tell me, can a baby this big be that early? WONDERING

DEAR WONDERING: The baby was on time, the wedding was late.
________________________________________

DEAR ABBY: Do you think about dying much? CURIOUS

DEAR CURIOUS: No, it's the last thing I want to do.
________________________________________

DEAR ABBY: Is it possible for a man to be in love with two women at the same time? JAKE

DEAR JAKE: Yes, and also hazardous.
________________________________________

DEAR ABBY: I know boys will be boys, but my 'boy' is seventy-three and he's still chasing women. Any suggestions? ANNIE

DEAR ANNIE: Don't worry. My dog has been chasing cars for years, but if he ever caught one, he wouldn't know what to do with it.
________________________________________

DEAR ABBY: I have always wanted to have my family history traced, but I can't afford to spend a lot of money to do it. Any suggestions? SAM IN CAL.

DEAR SAM: Yes. Run for public office.
________________________________________

DEAR ABBY: What inspires you most to write? TED

DEAR TED: The Bureau of Internal Revenue.
________________________________________

DEAR ABBY: When you are being introduced, is it all right to say, "I've heard a lot about you"? RITA

DEAR RITA: It depends on what you've heard.
________________________________________

DEAR ABBY: I am forty-four years old and I would like to meet a man my age with no bad habits. ROSE

DEAR ROSE: So would I.
________________________________________

DEAR ABBY: What's the difference between a wife and a mistress? BESS

DEAR BESS: Night and Day.

by **IanC** » Wed Apr 09, 2008 12:49 pm

Chrono Crow wrote:WHAT?

Hahahaha!!! :lol:

by **Chrono Crow** » Fri Apr 11, 2008 4:46 pm

As if you needed more proof:

http://blog.wired.com/gadgets/2008/04/f ... go-sp.html

Bored

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