I don't buy the horrible person thing, but even if it were true, there's no reason that should continue to be the case. People go through all sorts of changes throughout life. Sometimes I look back on things I've said and ways I've been and I cringe, because I'd like to think that I know better than that now.

Anyway, thank you for considering my suggestion. Please do have a word with your doctor.

Finally, and I'm addressing everyone here, may I humbly suggest that we leave it at that for now? Far be it for me to be the arbiter of conversation – I obviously have no authority over anyone – but I think we've probably gotten as far as we can with this for the time being, and I don't think there's much benefit in lashing out at one another or going round in circles. If you disagree, please continue. It's honestly just a suggestion, but I'd hate to see everyone walking away with sourer feelings than they arrived with. There's really no need for that.

I'd like an apology from EsBe for calling me a tuna sandwich though.

Seriously there's no need to call someone the c word.

I mean really. No need.

Aaaaaahahahahahahahaha...I really have no idea what I'm dressing up as tomorrow for work. Halloween has always been my thing, you see. I've already been asked by 4 different people. I just keep saying "it's a secret"...even to me. Just uninspired.

I hate the way your countries OTT attitude to Halloween has spread to the UK. Its for kids, and i mean young kids. Thats it. There should none of this stupid dressing up at work, or parties, or any of that rickin'-frackin' bullhonky.

IanC wrote:I hate the way your countries OTT attitude to Halloween has spread to the UK. Its for kids, and i mean young kids. Thats it. There should none of this stupid dressing up at work, or parties, or any of that rickin'-frackin' bullhonky.

In your world, fine. In my world, quite the opposite. But I can respect your opinion. Please respect my old lawn (from 2 years ago). <guitar solo>

How childish.

Do you get trick or treaters? If not why waste your time and money on that stupid rubbish.

No. Well, there was one really small coffin on the lawn.
Yes.
Either way, I do it all because it makes me happy. And no, you are not able to judge what should or should not make me happy.

*shrugs*

I can however call you childish. Because you are. Halloween is for kids, and I mean kids not teens.

And if it makes you happy then thats just sad. Wow. A crappy decoration makes you happy? Thats just sad.

And people think I'm not a horrible arsehole? Haha.

Video games and anime are for kids. Action films are for cretins. Rock music is for reprobates. Novels are for the intellectually unrigorous. Music is decadent.

I mean, if you want to go out of your way to alienate people, go for it, but at that point you revoke your right to complain about it, particularly to those people.

I'm not into Halloween either, but note that I don't go around being a prick about it. It's not that hard. What you do is: don't go out of your way to tell people you think they're decidedly unpleasant for liking the things they like. It's actually slightly easier than the alternative, as you get to avoid all that speaking or typing.

OK, I'm being sarcastic, but don't take that as some kind of vendetta as you seem to with Chris. You obviously have issues that are way bigger than anything going on here. I genuinely do want you to sort them out. It'll make you a happier person and a better person. It'll be better for everyone. Please do go for it. But if you continue flinging fists out at the world, sometimes a fist will fly back. You don't get to complain about that.

I think we've been very patient with you in the face of some really sour attitude. EsBe did go way overboard and I don't think that was constructive, gut you'll note that no-one was asking you for an apology when you told them to fork off or disregarded their well-meaning advice out of hand or whatever. I can't speak for everyone else, but I've tried to resist the temptation to snap back at you because you're clearly dealing with issues, and we're trying to find ways to help you deal with that as best we can. It seemed to me that escalating the situation would undo what progress we had made, so, imagining myself to be some facsimile of a proper grown-up, I tried to move things on in a constructive manner. That's also why I asked that we put a lid on things, advice which I'm now completely failing to follow.

Because I'm sorry, maybe this it completely wrong and counter-productive, but the way you act it seems like you don't want your situation to improve. You know you're being an arsehole; you say it in your post. If you ever find yourself thinking "I'm an arsehole for saying this to someone", don't rickin'-frackin' say it! You don't need to! You're just hurting someone else's mood, then they react and hurt yours. Sure, sometimes people irritate you, but is that really worth publicly undermining their character over?

No hard feelings, but please try to meet us half-way. Make an effort.

Halloween is my jam. I'm Tina from Bob's Burgers this year:



My friends are dressed as a figure from an Alphonse Mucha painting and as Queen Boudica, because they are much more cultured than I am, apparently.

Oh Ian. Okay so your self-worth is extremely low and you've aligned your expectations to match it, so now you're seeking validation by trying to get everyone to agree that you're vile. Then you'll have proved that you're right, about how misery is all you can ever have and nothing can possibly fix you. That's how the depression gets you; it digs into your brain, becomes part of your identity and then you protect and nurture it like your first-born child.

I think it's nonsense though. I think you're working quite hard to goad everyone here into telling you you're a necessarily twisted and loathsome creature, but it's not actually true. You've certainly displayed a raft of character flaws over the last few years; you've been childish, bitter, sanctimonious and needy. In your occasional good moods, though, you're rather pleasant to read, and all those flaws are the clear result of grave and deep-rooted insecurity. So I don't agree that you're a darkened, broken soul beyond help; I think you're a normal human with a bitter ball of common problems, which can be worked on and alleviated. You're in thrall to your depression and you're getting validation out of feeling weak. Take earnest steps against it, though, and it doesn't matter whether they're effective. You'll feel like a proactive guy who works hard at difficult problems; it's a free win.

I've been deliberating over whether to post this or send it as a PM, but in the end I think I'll post it. It's damnably preachy, and it's not an attempt to open a dialogue (although comments are welcome, in public or private form). But I don't think there's any further benefit to feeble, go-you attempts at encouragement. Be cognizant of the fact that it's possible for you to feel better. I'm not saying you'll plough through every problem and solve everything – nobody does that – but you can disabuse yourself of the notion that depression is a crucial aspect of your character. After that, your problems will take the shape of normal problems, woven of the usual material.

jvcc wrote:Halloween is my jam. I'm Tina from Bob's Burgers this year:



My friends are dressed as a figure from an Alphonse Mucha painting and as Queen Boudica, because they are much more cultured than I am, apparently.

That's pretty spot-on jvcc. Awesome!
I decided on a spider victim at work today (which I need to get back to).

I was trying to find a pic that Dusk posted some time ago, but it seems that all of his images are broken now

But I will still convey the message without the proper imagery to accompany it -- and this goes out to Ian: Don't be a dick!

Skimba wrote: That's pretty spot-on jvcc. Awesome!
I decided on a spider victim at work today (which I need to get back to).

Thank you! And that is a very specific costume idea.

Does that mean you'll apply makeup to mimic the swelling and redness that can result from a venomous spider bite, cover yourself in tiny fake spiders, or wrap yourself up in tons of fake spiderweb?

jvcc wrote:

Skimba wrote: That's pretty spot-on jvcc. Awesome!
I decided on a spider victim at work today (which I need to get back to).

Thank you! And that is a very specific costume idea.

Does that mean you'll apply makeup to mimic the swelling and redness that can result from a venomous spider bite, cover yourself in tiny fake spiders, or wrap yourself up in tons of fake spiderweb?

Pretty much...and I have a 2ft black widow on my head (spider-hat, spider-hat) and 1ft ones on my back, hip and leg. Although I couldn't find my red paint this morning, so the bites are oozy-green. Mutant spiders.

Today has been hell.

You all think I'm insane and in need of therapy. The lady I've been chatting to might be too young for me (in a not legal way ) Next week's work schedule is going to suck horribly (and don't tell me to quit you lot okay). And then the rickin'-frackin' bus didn't turn up so I had to walk home.

And if I have one more person ask if we are closing down I swear I'm to kill someone.

And sum yun gai can go fork himself.

Skimba wrote:

jvcc wrote:

Skimba wrote: That's pretty spot-on jvcc. Awesome!
I decided on a spider victim at work today (which I need to get back to).

Thank you! And that is a very specific costume idea.

Does that mean you'll apply makeup to mimic the swelling and redness that can result from a venomous spider bite, cover yourself in tiny fake spiders, or wrap yourself up in tons of fake spiderweb?

Pretty much...and I have a 2ft black widow on my head (spider-hat, spider-hat) and 1ft ones on my back, hip and leg. Although I couldn't find my red paint this morning, so the bites are oozy-green. Mutant spiders.

Well, that makes sense. It is unusual to find black widows that are naturally two-foot across.

IanC wrote:You all think I'm insane and in need of therapy.

a) Depression isn't what most people would call insanity.
b) There's nothing wrong with mental health issues. Someone wouldn't be ashamed of having to go to the doctor for a physical health problem, so why should they be ashamed of going to a therapist for a mental health problem? Society has some really messed up preconceptions regarding mental health, but that's all bullhonky. Look after your mental health. Use all the help you can get. It's important.
c) Loads of people see therapists, most of whom you would probably describe as "normal".

NO EXCUSES. Put some effort into sorting yourself out or stop complaining.

IanC wrote:And sum yun gai can go fork himself.

Enough of this attitude. This is the exact sort of thing that makes people want to tell you not to be a dick.

James. James James James. fork you. You think I don't know what depression is? Guess what. I have suffered from depression since 2009. I know what it is. So don't act so high and mighty about it.

You think I'm more than depressed though. I can tell, I'm not stupid.

I've had my highs and lows these past few years. I know what its like. So don't get all holier than thou on me. Dick.

On the left is every overt insult IanC has directed at someone else during the course of this conversation, and on the right is his response to the one overt insult directed at him.

In the interest of fairness, Esbe could apologize to Ian and then Ian could apologize to me, Mysty, Skimba, Chris, Esbe, and James.

Or, like James suggested earlier, we can just let the conversation rest now and move on. Ian said he's going to seek professional help; whether or not he believes that we support him, that is an ideal outcome, and continuing to talk about this on here doesn't seem to be helping anything at all.

I have never used the C word though.

Also my post yesterday had NOTHING to do with the previous chain. Yet James jumped on it and turned it into one.

Can't I complain about having a crappy day now?

Edit - also I shouldn't told sum yum gai to fork himself. Sorry.

IanC wrote:I have never used the C word though.

Correct. Is it also correct that haven't insulted anyone here?

IanC wrote:Can't I complain about having a crappy day now?

You can do whatever you want, just so long as you don't insult people or the things they value.

Did I say that? No. Maybe o was going to make an apology about it. But maybe James acting like a total jerk got in the way. And now maybe I think what's the point since no ones going to believe it anyway.