A whine and complain thread

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Re: A whine and complain thread

Postby ntw3001 » Sat Nov 07, 2015 8:48 pm

Jesus. That is really weird (the Twitter thing). I wonder what motivates them to do that.

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Re: A whine and complain thread

Postby jvcc » Sat Nov 07, 2015 11:39 pm

Talking to a doctor would be good.

And yeah, the Twitter person sounds like an objectionable person. Can you shut down your account for a bit or hold off from posting?
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Re: A whine and complain thread

Postby IanC » Sun Nov 08, 2015 4:35 pm

Said guy was always an objectionable person, so I'm not too surprised. But still, getting people to send him screenshots?

Now that is stalkerish, isn't it? Im not sure what to do, i can protect my account but that makes it harder to interact with people outside of people i follow and follow me back.
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Re: A whine and complain thread

Postby chrismachine » Sun Nov 08, 2015 5:55 pm

Whatever it is, it's definitely sounding like someone going out of their way to be mean and intimidating, and if you know who it is you should likely report their account. If you've seen the screenshots in that guy's posts or something, report him instead.
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Re: A whine and complain thread

Postby IanC » Sun Nov 08, 2015 6:20 pm

I don't know who is doing the screenshotting. All I know is someone is taking screenshots and sharing them via email.

I admit i sometimes post stupid poopcakes, but who doesn't?
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Re: A whine and complain thread

Postby IanC » Mon Nov 16, 2015 5:07 pm

Okay so this objectionable person is now making fun of me self harming. What an absolute tuna sandwich. There is nothing funny about self harming. Its something i do so rarely now, and i had a relapse yesterday, yet he thinks its funny. I want to find this screen capping dick and punch him. Seriously.
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Re: A whine and complain thread

Postby Skimba » Tue Nov 17, 2015 2:28 pm

That's awful. I'm sorry to hear that. He's a total douche-canoe.
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Re: A whine and complain thread

Postby IanC » Tue Nov 17, 2015 3:19 pm

I don't know what is worse, the person taking the screenshots, or the two people laughing at self harming.
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Re: A whine and complain thread

Postby ntw3001 » Wed Nov 18, 2015 9:01 pm

I don't know what to say about those people. What a miserable life they must have to get their kicks in such a way.

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Re: A whine and complain thread

Postby IanC » Thu Nov 19, 2015 3:16 pm

Well going by one of them's most recent comment is showing himself as an obvious troll. Other guy? Just an objectionable person.
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Re: A whine and complain thread

Postby jvcc » Sat Nov 21, 2015 12:42 pm

Yeah, fork those people. Would it help to take a break from Twitter or, if you want to talk about something personal, do it using a different online forum where no one will harass you?
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Re: A whine and complain thread

Postby IanC » Sun Nov 22, 2015 7:58 pm

who cares. they are right
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Re: A whine and complain thread

Postby jvcc » Fri Dec 04, 2015 6:26 pm

Well, I don't agree, but it's your prerogative to believe what you want.

In other news, I managed to avoid "boy troubles" of any description throughout my formative years and most of my adult life. However, earlier this year I made a friend, who has been friends with my best friend since childhood, to whom I have found myself very attracted. He lives far away, so I see him at most once a month. We kissed one night over the summer and have fooled around in some way almost every time I've seen him since then.

We would always stop because he would start to feel weird about it, seemingly always for a different reason. He's also friends with my brother, so he thought that would be an issue (it wouldn't be). He thought he was getting too old for flings and should be looking for a more serious relationship (again, I personally disagree). This last time he brought up that he has a girlfriend now (admittedly, that's a more sizable impediment).

Essentially, the pattern is I get excited to see him, I have fun fooling around with him, and then I experience pretty strong feelings of disappointment when we have to stop before I get to sleep with him.

It's probably important to note at this point that while I was sexually aggressive toward him, I made sure that he wanted it too. I would ask before I did anything and, conversely, if he wanted me to stop. His wanting it was not the issue. He was just raised in a very religious family and still has some holdovers about casual sex. Plus I think he's a little insecure around and intimidated by me.

I didn't intend for anything to happen the last time I saw him because I knew he started dating his one of his exes again, but apparently you can't leave us alone in a room together.

I've now told him that it will be easier for me to not see him. My reasoning is that the cycle of excitement-fun-disappointment could potentially continue indefinitely, and I want to break it, even though it sucks because I like hanging out with him.

I'm worried, though, that there are some parallels between my behavior and the douche-y sorts of guys who complain about women friendzoning them. I don't want the message he receives to be "no sex, no friendship."

So, advice is appreciated. Or I can provide more context if enough hasn't yet been sufficiently provided for the purposes of constructing advice to offer.
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Re: A whine and complain thread

Postby Null » Sat Dec 05, 2015 12:11 am

It seems to me that if you enjoy this person's company, and he enjoys yours, that perhaps a happy medium might be found.

Since you enjoy his company. entertain him in more public places. Movies or parties, any place where "being alone" isn't a problem. In time, you may simply discover that you enjoy his company not for sexual reasons but simply because there are many non-sexual things you enjoy.

Please note: I AM THE worst person ever about....many things. Still, I hate to see a genuine friendship go to waste.

Also please note: I've got no stake in anything, I just would like to see happiness move beyond a vague concept. And best of luck to you, no matter what.

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Re: A whine and complain thread

Postby sum yun gai » Sat Dec 05, 2015 1:19 pm

I also can't admit to having the specific situation you describe in my history with other women, other than I've felt attracted to some and tried to make my interest known but never managed to get to the "fooling around" business with more than a couple. But I also think I'm an odd ilk that can have friendships with women I'm sexually attracted to without feeling like I have to be seeking more than the friendship.

If he's hung up on the concept of casual sex, and you two have other interests besides each other, I don't think it's at all out of the ordinary to try spending time with him doing "friend" things like ...whatever it is kids do these days :P I dunno, movies? arcades? twitter wars? If you have things in common a friendship can be cultivated, but if the only things you have in common is your physical attraction then cutting things off is probably the only way to move forward for both of you.
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Re: A whine and complain thread

Postby jvcc » Sat Dec 05, 2015 3:22 pm

We definitely have a friendship, but I think I want to have sex with him too badly to be his friend.
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Re: A whine and complain thread

Postby chrismachine » Sat Dec 05, 2015 5:13 pm

It would be quite the experiment to tell him that and see what happens...
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Re: A whine and complain thread

Postby ntw3001 » Sat Dec 05, 2015 5:44 pm

So that's why all those women stopped talking to me. Makes sense.

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Re: A whine and complain thread

Postby IanC » Sat Dec 05, 2015 6:17 pm

Just frick-frack each other ;)
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Re: A whine and complain thread

Postby jvcc » Sat Dec 05, 2015 6:53 pm

I have told him I want to have sex with him several times and he said he wants to as well. But, like I said, he always stops before it happens.

I also told him, I think verbatim, "I can't be around you and not want to be physically close to you." His response was something to the effect of not knowing it had gotten that bad or my feelings had gone that far or whatever.

I talked to our mutual friend about it, and I'm gonna stick to my decision to not see him anymore. Being repeatedly disappointed is too hard for me, and it's negatively impacting my actual sex life.
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Re: A whine and complain thread

Postby Null » Sat Dec 05, 2015 10:05 pm

jvcc wrote:We definitely have a friendship, but I think I want to have sex with him too badly to be his friend.


I'm trying to imagine being told that, and I am failing spectacularly.

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Re: A whine and complain thread

Postby jvcc » Sat Dec 12, 2015 6:30 pm

Currently assigning my students their final grades. Some made stupid mistakes and are trying to push them off on me and bargain for a higher grade. I'm not having it, but it's still frustrating to have to deal with.

I'm very happy with another student's outcome, though. As of two weeks ago she had turned in one assignment worth 25 points out of the 1000 possible for the class. She had also been a driving force in a class debate, the outcome of which was that students had the option to revise every assignment once for a higher grade. She turned in the last two major assignments and submitted six that she hadn't done earlier in the semester.

We've talked a bit and I know that she's had a lot of personal issues to deal with this semester. But she's very smart and I'm glad she just pulled off a C.

So, some whining, some happiness. Gonna grab Chipotle and get back to grading.
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Re: A whine and complain thread

Postby jvcc » Sat Dec 12, 2015 7:35 pm

Aw yiss, one more student who missed a bunch of assignments pulled it together for a C.

She had many personal issues too. Like a lot of my students, she's from a rough part of Chicago and her little brother, who is alive still, has been shot several times. The family realized he's being targeted, so they're relocating. Obviously all this made it hard for her to focus on school, but she managed it.
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Re: A whine and complain thread

Postby Skimba » Fri Jan 08, 2016 7:00 pm

Just found out that we will not be getting our end-of-the-year bonuses this year (we have gotten them for the past 14 years I have worked here). They normally happen in December, but nothing happened and no one was talking. The CEO sent an e-mail today basically saying "Company has done good, but we be spending the monies from the past for the future, silly employees who were looking forward to paying off holiday expenses like you have for every year in the past. Keep working hard and you might be rewarded at some point in the future." There's so much more I could go into about things like unnecessary promotions leading to further top-heavy management, them taking away $10K from my salary (that's a whole OTHER story), the fact that it is January 8th and this is the first we have heard anything...UGH! There are so many more people way worse off than I am, and I am grateful for what I do have, but it's still annoying, frustrating and enraging. I just needed to vent. I'm finally putting my resume together this month and will try and GTFO. Have a good weekend all!
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Re: A whine and complain thread

Postby sum yun gai » Sat Jan 09, 2016 5:24 am

Good luck searching! I'd help you look, but I don't know what it is you do, nor exactly where you live, nor what you might think you want to do, but good luck all the same!
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