Second One Sentence at a Time Spamusement Story
Re: Second One Sentence at a Time Spamusement Story
"Just my luck," I muttered, "No wifi in the vortex."
ntw3001 wrote:you can't get raped if you always say yes
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Re: Second One Sentence at a Time Spamusement Story
The dust parted in front of me and light came streaming down from some place far above.
ntw3001 wrote:Sass has to come from the heart, not from the shirt.
traubster wrote:I find it irritating whenever I walk through a cemetery and there's not one gravestone that reads something like, "We're all grateful that he's dead. Sorry if he owed you money."
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Re: Second One Sentence at a Time Spamusement Story
"Mom?", I inquired.
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Re: Second One Sentence at a Time Spamusement Story
"Why did you ever agree to that nickname when your name is Sven?" I finally blurted out, after some hesitation.

Veepa wrote:Very wise words, Master Tiny Legs.
Re: Second One Sentence at a Time Spamusement Story
"You are welcome to remove self from snow, if you do not want help from Mom."
ntw3001 wrote:you can't get raped if you always say yes
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Re: Second One Sentence at a Time Spamusement Story
It quickly became apparent that this was metaphorical snow.
END OF CHAPTER ONE
END OF CHAPTER ONE

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Re: Second One Sentence at a Time Spamusement Story
Outside, it looked like the remnants of a great party had happened overnight which was immediately confirmed by the sound of retching coming from the alleyway.
ntw3001 wrote:Sass has to come from the heart, not from the shirt.
traubster wrote:I find it irritating whenever I walk through a cemetery and there's not one gravestone that reads something like, "We're all grateful that he's dead. Sorry if he owed you money."
Re: Second One Sentence at a Time Spamusement Story
The sound of retching steadily intensified and soon it was coming from all directions.
ntw3001 wrote:you can't get raped if you always say yes
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Re: Second One Sentence at a Time Spamusement Story
When an adjacent, possibly hallucination-induced, portal revealed the source, I could barely disguise my shock.

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Re: Second One Sentence at a Time Spamusement Story
The electricity flowed directly from my bones, lucky not to have been perceived.

Veepa wrote:Very wise words, Master Tiny Legs.
Re: Second One Sentence at a Time Spamusement Story
I would have preferred not to have gone into the retch portal, but its gravitational pull had other ideas.
ntw3001 wrote:you can't get raped if you always say yes
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Re: Second One Sentence at a Time Spamusement Story
I felt, not unsurprisingly, as though I was going to be sick.
ntw3001 wrote:Sass has to come from the heart, not from the shirt.
traubster wrote:I find it irritating whenever I walk through a cemetery and there's not one gravestone that reads something like, "We're all grateful that he's dead. Sorry if he owed you money."
Re: Second One Sentence at a Time Spamusement Story
Thankfully the electricity emanating from my bones and pulsing through my muscles was sufficient to numb the parts of my gastrointestinal tract necessary for retching so that, while I was continuously dry heaving, I did not, in fact, retch.
ntw3001 wrote:you can't get raped if you always say yes
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Re: Second One Sentence at a Time Spamusement Story
Thirty seconds later, though, I did in fact retch.

Veepa wrote:Very wise words, Master Tiny Legs.
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Re: Second One Sentence at a Time Spamusement Story
A voice boomed from the sky, demanding that my gastrointestinal tract make up its mind.

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Re: Second One Sentence at a Time Spamusement Story
"Please tell me it's not the giant mantis again," I muttered to no one in particular.
gif wrote:you can't stuff a coin down a stripper's g-string
My SiteJudas Maccabeus wrote:Give a man a fire and he's warm for a day. Set a man on fire and he's warm for the rest of his life.
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Re: Second One Sentence at a Time Spamusement Story
I heard a noise behind me and turned around to see what was there.
ntw3001 wrote:Sass has to come from the heart, not from the shirt.
traubster wrote:I find it irritating whenever I walk through a cemetery and there's not one gravestone that reads something like, "We're all grateful that he's dead. Sorry if he owed you money."
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Re: Second One Sentence at a Time Spamusement Story
"Oh, it's just you," I said.
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Re: Second One Sentence at a Time Spamusement Story
"You look terrible!" I remarked to the mirror hanging haphazardly from the broken wall.
ntw3001 wrote:Sass has to come from the heart, not from the shirt.
traubster wrote:I find it irritating whenever I walk through a cemetery and there's not one gravestone that reads something like, "We're all grateful that he's dead. Sorry if he owed you money."
Re: Second One Sentence at a Time Spamusement Story
"It takes one to know one, bub," I replied.
ntw3001 wrote:you can't get raped if you always say yes
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Re: Second One Sentence at a Time Spamusement Story
The mirror shattered into an uncountable number of pieces.

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Re: Second One Sentence at a Time Spamusement Story
Seeing this as a challenge, I began in earnest.

Veepa wrote:Very wise words, Master Tiny Legs.
Re: Second One Sentence at a Time Spamusement Story
But I ended up in Algernon.
ntw3001 wrote:you can't get raped if you always say yes
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