BLURT thread

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Re: BLURT thread

Postby jvcc » Sat Apr 19, 2014 2:26 pm

IanC wrote:So guys, does anyone on here have any experience in online dating sites? Just wondering, for a friend, you know?


I've only ever used free dating sites. In my experience the people using online dating sites are either looking for casual sex, have difficulty initiating and maintaining relationships in real life, or are too busy with school or their careers to find time to meet someone offline. I met my current boyfriend on a dating site, and we both fell into the third category.

Any of those categories is fine, as long as you're honest with yourself and the people you meet about your motives. In my online dating history (using OkCupid and PlentyofFish) I've met up with five different people: one fell into the first category but acted as if he wanted a relationship, which was not fair to me; three fell into the second category in terms of being incredibly clingy, so I cut off contact with them without explaining why--which was, obviously, not fair to them. It's hard to be upfront and direct about this kind of stuff, for me anyway, but I think it's the only way to navigate the dating realm, online or offline, successfully.
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Re: BLURT thread

Postby IanC » Sun Apr 20, 2014 12:30 pm

POF is the one I'm on. I mean... oh i won't bother trying to keep the joke running :P

But thing is, I've contacted quite a few people, but never get any response. Im polite and all that... but nothing? Its kinda down heartening really.

It worked for one of the girls at work. Tho she is a super hot 18 year old. And im... not, really. Hmp.
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Re: BLURT thread

Postby jvcc » Mon Apr 21, 2014 9:59 pm

OkCupid has an interesting article on how to craft an effective first message. I would say it goes beyond mere rhetoric too, as two of the suggestions are to avoid giving physical compliments and to focus on the other person's interests as mentioned in his/her profile (or, even better, your shared interests). Doing both of those things requires you to look beyond physical attraction, and that will be evident to the person receiving the message. Speaking personally, I ignored every PM I got that just said "hey beautiful" or something similar.
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Re: BLURT thread

Postby IanC » Tue Apr 22, 2014 5:18 pm

Well i don't say something like "hey beautiful", lol. I do focus in on what people say on their profile.

I don't know, maybe there is something I'm doing wrong?
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Re: BLURT thread

Postby sum yun gai » Wed Apr 23, 2014 9:27 am

IanC wrote:Well i don't say something like "hey beautiful", lol. I do focus in on what people say on their profile.

I don't know, maybe there is something I'm doing wrong?


my own experience with online dating is to say that what you're doing wrong is the online part. i've found way better success just going places IRL and meeting random people than i ever did with teh internetz. i would also tell you to become more self-confident and not to second-guess yourself so often. it takes a lot of work to find someone to respond to you through online personals unless that site has a chat style area where you can "mingle" with the people you are hoping to go out with. but then again, that goes back to actually interacting with someone rather than reading some personal details, looking at their picture, and making a snap judgment about them.

and it should go without saying, but one more thing to keep in mind is that not all women online are female IRL....
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Re: BLURT thread

Postby IanC » Wed Apr 23, 2014 6:15 pm

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAH




HAH

Oh man *wipes tears of laughter from face*

Ah... funny.
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Re: BLURT thread

Postby MysticalDescent » Tue May 06, 2014 4:58 pm

I have one of those QI books of facts and found out that in some survey of some dating site, it was found that the biggest concern for most women on dating sites was meeting a serial killer, while the biggest concern for most men was meeting a fat woman.
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Re: BLURT thread

Postby James » Tue May 06, 2014 8:44 pm

Reminds me of a similar notion I heard: when going on date with a new person, men fear they could be laughed at, while women fear they could be killed. I couldn't tell you how accurate that is, but it seems depressingly plausible.
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Re: BLURT thread

Postby jvcc » Mon May 19, 2014 1:11 am

Anyone know a good taxi service in London or how much standard cab fare is there? I'm going to spend most of my adventures abroad aboard cheaper transport vehicles, but my flight to London gets in late and I don't entirely like the idea of navigating the tubes and buses of an unfamiliar city alone at night.

Also, some peers of mine have advised me to tell people I'm Canadian given general anti-US sentiment. These people did get a lot of flak for being American when they visited England, but that was some years ago and, perhaps significantly, during George W's presidency. So I don't think I'll need to lie about my country of origin, but I thought I'd get a second opinion on the matter.
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Re: BLURT thread

Postby IanC » Mon May 19, 2014 8:01 am

Eh, as long as you don't visit any predominately muslim areas you should be fine saying you are from the US.
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Re: BLURT thread

Postby ntw3001 » Mon May 19, 2014 4:32 pm

Ya don't bother telling folks you're Canadian. Most people probably won't take the liberty of asking, and if they do, they'll show polite interest and ask what state. Then you'll say... Illinois? I think? And - unless they've been to Chicago - while they're struggling to devise a follow-up question pertaining to Illinois (ntw3001's hot pick: 'That's in the North, isn't it?') you can pounce with a change of subject, saving you from having to describe Illinois and them from having Illinois described to them. This is my advised conversational strategy.

Taxis: Who knows? As a general rule, they will cost more money than you thought they were going to. I recommend nonetheless that you do not consciously adjust your expectations; the fare will rise accordingly.
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Re: BLURT thread

Postby MysticalDescent » Mon May 19, 2014 4:47 pm

jvcc wrote:Anyone know a good taxi service in London or how much standard cab fare is there? I'm going to spend most of my adventures abroad aboard cheaper transport vehicles, but my flight to London gets in late and I don't entirely like the idea of navigating the tubes and buses of an unfamiliar city alone at night.

Also, some peers of mine have advised me to tell people I'm Canadian given general anti-US sentiment. These people did get a lot of flak for being American when they visited England, but that was some years ago and, perhaps significantly, during George W's presidency. So I don't think I'll need to lie about my country of origin, but I thought I'd get a second opinion on the matter.


I can't really help about taxis sorry, I've only ever taken a cab in London once. Maybe there's somebody on here who has spent more time in London than me, but in my experience, the most convenient and straightforward way to get about the place is on the tube, so I'd recommend that as the best option for day to day travel. On the first night, though, I'd agree that a taxi would be the best option - sorry I can't help you any more than that.

I can't imagine there really being much problem with saying you're American and when I've been there I haven't seen anybody suffer from any anti-American sentiment, despite seeing an awful lot of Americans around the place. I suppose there's always a risk, though.
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Re: BLURT thread

Postby chrismachine » Mon May 19, 2014 7:06 pm

I would totally rat you out.
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Re: BLURT thread

Postby James » Tue May 20, 2014 4:06 pm

If you're arriving late I would definitely recommend arranging a taxi beforehand. If you're not landing at London City Airport (which I imagine you're not - I think it's mainly for domestic flights) there's a good chance all the public transport will have stopped by then (and even in central London, the Tube stops around midnight, depending on the line, although night buses can get you pretty much anywhere if you're willing to take the time and be in the presence of drunk strangers). I go caught out in that exact situation coming back from Sweden a couple of years ago. I landed late so the trains had stopped. I'd been hoping to just find or call a minicab, but when it came to it it was far too late for me to have the energy to work that out, so I eventually just tool one of the black cabs that pulled up at the taxi rank. That got me home dine, but it cost a lot more than if I'd booked a minicab in advance. It's actually pretty cheap for me to get to and from Heathrow if I use one of the taxi companies near where I live (by which I mean under £20; i think it was more like £60 for a black cab, but I don't really remember).

As for a particular good service, I'm not sure. I guess I'd recommend a company local to wherever you're headed, as they tend to serve a particular area. I imagine there will be some sort of review website that will give you a recommendation.

As for being American, I don't think that should be much of a problem -- I work with an American and he spends a lot of his free time in central London and as far as I'm aware he doesn't get much grief. He's a bit of a weird guy in general, though, so perhaps he just has thick skin. Either way, at worst you'd just get some lip from people who are arsehole, so you wouldn't have wanted to be talking to them anyway. If you're still worried about it, perhaps you could make light of it: "I'm American, but don't hold that against me". Or is that just obnoxious? Don't ask me; I don't know how to talk to people.
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Re: BLURT thread

Postby jvcc » Tue May 20, 2014 7:43 pm

Thank you for the advice and jokes, everyone. I will now respond to specific quotes individually.

ntw3000 wrote:Ya don't bother telling folks you're Canadian. Most people probably won't take the liberty of asking, and if they do, they'll show polite interest and ask what state. Then you'll say... Illinois? I think? And - unless they've been to Chicago - while they're struggling to devise a follow-up question pertaining to Illinois (ntw3001's hot pick: 'That's in the North, isn't it?') you can pounce with a change of subject, saving you from having to describe Illinois and them from having Illinois described to them. This is my advised conversational strategy.

Yeah, even when I travel to other states within the US I tell people I'm from "near to Chicago."

chrismachine wrote:I would totally rat you out.

Snitches get stitches.

James wrote:If you're arriving late I would definitely recommend arranging a taxi beforehand.

That's the plan, although I don't know how long it will take me to check-out at the airport so that may complicate my cab arrangements. The best deal I've found online so far is just under £60 to get me from Gatwick to my hostel in Tottenham.
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Re: BLURT thread

Postby James » Wed May 21, 2014 3:24 am

The cab firms should all be very experienced at dealing with airports. They generally take your flight number so they'll know when you actually land, and I'm sure they have a fair idea for how long checking out usually takes.
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Re: BLURT thread

Postby mulpis » Wed May 21, 2014 8:50 am

I can add that my parents just returned from a week in London, and they said its one of the friendliest cities they've visited, and they've visited a LOT of cities. So there's that.
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Re: BLURT thread

Postby jvcc » Wed May 21, 2014 2:20 pm

James wrote:The cab firms should all be very experienced at dealing with airports. They generally take your flight number so they'll know when you actually land, and I'm sure they have a fair idea for how long checking out usually takes.

That's good to know. I am not very experienced at dealing with airports. Or cabs, for that matter. Up to the present date I've had one two-way plane journey--when I was five, so my parents managed most of the travel logistics--and one one-way cab ride as an adult. But I will be a master of both by the end of this trip.

mulpis wrote:I can add that my parents just returned from a week in London, and they said its one of the friendliest cities they've visited, and they've visited a LOT of cities. So there's that.

That is also good to know. I'm really excited to explore London and Dublin. It's only successfully navigating them that I'm worried about.
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Re: BLURT thread

Postby ntw3001 » Wed May 21, 2014 4:48 pm

jvcc wrote:Thank you for the advice and jokes, everyone. I will now respond to specific quotes individually.

ntw3000 wrote:Ya don't bother telling folks you're Canadian. Most people probably won't take the liberty of asking, and if they do, they'll show polite interest and ask what state. Then you'll say... Illinois? I think? And - unless they've been to Chicago - while they're struggling to devise a follow-up question pertaining to Illinois (ntw3001's hot pick: 'That's in the North, isn't it?') you can pounce with a change of subject, saving you from having to describe Illinois and them from having Illinois described to them. This is my advised conversational strategy.

Yeah, even when I travel to other states within the US I tell people I'm from "near to Chicago."


ntw3000? Why did I even notice that I don't know.

I am also attempting to book flights! But it's for some reason difficult, mostly on account of the procrastination over which I have no earthly control. I tried looking at price comparison sites, but wound up trying to figure out the exact technique the airline was planning to use to fork me (baggage, of course; they slyly slip into the small print that all baggage allowance has to be purchased separately and costs twice as much when the customer learns this at the airport. Then to find the excess baggage allowances, you simply look up the two cities you're travelling between to obtain the appropriate excess baggage code, then cross-reference that code with [MYSTERY VALUE] on their handy code-grid to find the rate for that particular flight! [MYSTERY VALUE] appears not to exist; I decided this airline was more likely than most to grab my wallet and throw me into the sea).
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Re: BLURT thread

Postby jvcc » Wed May 21, 2014 5:08 pm

ntw2999 wrote:
jvcc wrote:Thank you for the advice and jokes, everyone. I will now respond to specific quotes individually.

ntw3000 wrote:Ya don't bother telling folks you're Canadian. Most people probably won't take the liberty of asking, and if they do, they'll show polite interest and ask what state. Then you'll say... Illinois? I think? And - unless they've been to Chicago - while they're struggling to devise a follow-up question pertaining to Illinois (ntw3001's hot pick: 'That's in the North, isn't it?') you can pounce with a change of subject, saving you from having to describe Illinois and them from having Illinois described to them. This is my advised conversational strategy.

Yeah, even when I travel to other states within the US I tell people I'm from "near to Chicago."


ntw3000? Why did I even notice that I don't know.


I don't know what you're talking about.
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Re: BLURT thread

Postby ntw3001 » Wed May 21, 2014 8:34 pm

Allow me to clarify! The quote before was mistakenly attributed to the impostor ntw3000, presumably due to some clerical error. The most interesting part of the whole affair is that anyone (me) noticed. Do I have nothing better to do with my time?
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Re: BLURT thread

Postby jvcc » Wed May 21, 2014 9:15 pm

ntw2998 wrote:Allow me to clarify! The quote before was mistakenly attributed to the impostor ntw3000, presumably due to some clerical error.

What a ridiculous accusation.
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Re: BLURT thread

Postby ntw3001 » Fri May 23, 2014 2:36 pm

My mistake. I didn't know you were acquainted with ntw2999.
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Re: BLURT thread

Postby sum yun gai » Tue Jun 03, 2014 2:41 am

jvcccp wrote:
ntw2998 wrote:Allow me to clarify! The quote before was mistakenly attributed to the impostor ntw3000, presumably due to some clerical error.

What a ridiculous accusation.


now now, let's not get testy with each other...
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Re: BLURT thread

Postby IanC » Tue Jun 03, 2014 11:33 am

sum old gai wrote:
jvcccp wrote:
ntw2998 wrote:Allow me to clarify! The quote before was mistakenly attributed to the impostor ntw3000, presumably due to some clerical error.

What a ridiculous accusation.


now now, let's not get testy with each other...

I don't know what you lot are on about
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